Club Bulletin
Volume 32, Issue No. 4- 23rd July 2018
Inside This Issue |
Upcoming Events12th August Bunnings BBQ - Dural
13th August Combined meeting at PH Golf Club
20th July SYMT - Rock of Ages
20th July Ronald McDonald House, Meal From the Heart
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Wanted - New MembersIf you know of someone who would benefit from Rotary, or, from whom Rotary would benefit if they were a member, then contact Keith.
Click here for a PDF copy of the form to the right, and send or give it to Tony C. |
The Garage Sale
We have just had our best and most successful Garage Sale on the weekend of 7&8 October raising a record gross - north of $35k.
Excellent Project Management and a large number of dedicated volunteers, some putting in hours of effort, in the weeks before the weekend contributed to this result. |
Meetings |
Monday 6:30pm for 7:00pm - Springfield House - 245 New Line Road, Dural 2158 |
Apologies |
If you are unable to attend or are bringing a guest (even if they are your partner) you must notify Carol.
Phone 8850 6515 or email carol.russell@ybr.com.au before 11am on the day of the meeting. |
If you are expected and do not show you will be required to pay for the meal.
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President Collin welcomed 22 members, including Honorary Member Brian Furrer to our first club assembly for the year. Larissa is not attending the club Assembly. We wish Bob a speedy recovery after being rushed into hospital late today.
We have three Joint meetings before the end of the calendar year.
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After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counselling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured.
Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband watched – with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said. “This is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this? “Well, I can drop her off here on Monday and Wednesday… but I fish on Fridays!!” |
Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and family values.
Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?' Larry replied, 'I'm really not sure, what was her maiden name? _____________________________________________________ A little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?' The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.' _____________________________________________________ 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week.' 'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.' _____________________________________________________ A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.' _____________________________________________________ An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' _____________________________________________________ Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder: 1. The DNA all matches. 2. There are no dental records. _____________________________________________________ A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?' The agent replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up. _____________________________________________________ Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez. 'How was he killed?' asked one detective. 'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied. 'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?' 'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.' _____________________________________________________ Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.' Joe: 'Really?' Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.' _____________________________________________________ A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling. 'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered. 'What did he say,' asked the nurse. 'Oops!' _____________________________________________________ While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice. 'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?' 'Better get a bikini,' he replied 'You'd never get it all in one.' He's still in intensive care. _____________________________________________________ The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance... The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.' Tony C
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