The Next Meetings |
Find our Facebook site
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Monday 06 March
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Murrin Bridge Farm Project -Steve Mansur
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Monday 13 March
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Memories Of a Ex-exchange Student - Sonya
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Monday 20 March
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The Forgotten Flotilla - Archeology in Crete
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Duty Roster
| Duty | Monday 06 March 2017 | Monday 13 March 2017 | Monday 20 March 2017 |
| Speaker Host | Colin McGowan | Howard Fleming | Tony Coote |
| Night Reporter | Charlotte McCartney | Peter Cleary | John Tchetchenian |
| Front Desk | Bob Davison | Bob Davison | Bob Davison |
| Front Desk | Bernard Chandra | Brian Furrer | Roslyn Savio |
| Steward | Alan Paynter | Nick Chuah | Ricardo Raad |
| Steward | Tom Westcott | Gino Savio | Carol Russell |
| IT Person | Neville Hansen | Neville Hansen | Neville Hansen |
| Photographer | Ross Ballinger | Peter Stanton | Ross Ballinger |
| Member Talk | Howard Fleming | Cawas Sahukar | Max Henderson |
Inside This Issue |
Upcoming Events |
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Note: The above are "safe" links. They merely navigate within this page.
Club CalendarTake me to the Club Calendar
Note: This link goes to another page. At the bottom of that page is a link back to this page.
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11th & 25th March
22nd March
7th - 9th April
8th May 2017
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Major Book Sortings for Book Sale
TALDUMANDE
2017 Charity Dinner Book Sale
WHP&C Rotary 30th Birthday
Please join us to celebrate another milestone of our Rotary Club Mark your diary now Partners Night Of Course |
District Conference
The District Conference will be held at the Penrith Panthers on Saturday 11th of March 2017.
Registrations at conferene2017.rotarydistrict9685.org.au
For a video on the District Conference at the Penrith Panthers click the video arrow below
Registrations at conferene2017.rotarydistrict9685.org.au
For a video on the District Conference at the Penrith Panthers click the video arrow below
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New School Initiative by Operation Food For Life at village of Kivoro-Poe
DENNIS PERRY -President Operation Food for Life 18th FEB., 2017
Accessible only by helicopter or 4 wheel drive vehicle KIVORI - POE village is located in a very remote area of Papua New Guinea. Over three hours west of Port Moresby the nation’s capital. The village is one of many along the coastline. It is estimated some 6000 families live in the area.
Operation Food for Life identified an urgent need for a Christian Early Learning School to serve the villages of the area, aware that at least 60 children, most who had no education, would immediately benefit from the school plant.
With a temporary “bush school” build, two qualified teachers ready to commence, all was in readiness to welcome students for the first term.
With Jim Hawkins, our Vice President, Phillip and Maureen Vaki (who are our incredible PNG Directors for our humanitarian work and ministry in the country,) travelled to the school for the memorable opening ceremony. We were totally overwhelmed when enrolments reached 120 children. ...and still counting as this goes to press.
Operation Food for Life identified an urgent need for a Christian Early Learning School to serve the villages of the area, aware that at least 60 children, most who had no education, would immediately benefit from the school plant.
With a temporary “bush school” build, two qualified teachers ready to commence, all was in readiness to welcome students for the first term.
With Jim Hawkins, our Vice President, Phillip and Maureen Vaki (who are our incredible PNG Directors for our humanitarian work and ministry in the country,) travelled to the school for the memorable opening ceremony. We were totally overwhelmed when enrolments reached 120 children. ...and still counting as this goes to press.
Education is free for the children who live in very poor communities.
The local village Chief stated "he had been praying for a long time for a Christian school to educate the children, paying tribute to Operation Food for Life’s commitment to Christian education to educate children who live in poor communities. You are also giving these children hope in Christ filled classrooms. Thank you. Thank you" the chief said. During this year Operation Food for Life will build a permanent two classroom facility with an additional first aid room to serve the school and the community. Jim Hawkins is managing this project. This will be Jims second build for Operation Food for Life having managed the construction for our Born Free Sanctuary which is providing 24/7 care for many children at risk and less fortunate. Thank you Jim for transforming so many lives you touch through Operation Food for Life. |
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The new school is another welcomed addition to all our humanitarian programs and projects in Papua New Guinea. This includes our first three teacher Operation Food for Life Rob and Jan Patterson Christian Literacy School in Wildlife Port Moresby which has 120 children enrolled this year.
We praise God for his leading and abundant blessings upon our hands and feet, as all our volunteers give ourselves away above self-interest to serve others of less fortunate circumstances. |
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Excerpt from Cherrybrook Public School Newsletter regarding our "Tree Of Joy" programme.
If you like to read the full Newsletter please click and download the pdf on the right. It is over 8Mb but makes fairly good reading. |
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Taldumande 2017 Charity Dinner
To help make this a success, we would be very grateful if you could support us in one or all of the following ways:
- Join us at the dinner on Wednesday 22nd March 2017.
- Make a tax deductible donation to Taldumande Youth Services at www.taldumande.org.au
Individual tickets are $185 or Table of 10 for $1750. Tickets covers entry to the event, entertainment, full three course meal and all beverages.
To purchase ticket, please go to https://www.taldumande.org.au/news/2017-charity-dinner or alternative, I can produce an invoice for you.
Your support would contribute towards the success of our fundraising dinner and our ability to provide these essential services to vulnerable and homeless young people.
Kind regards,
Kevin Marcus Tran
Fundraising and Events Coordinator
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2017 Book Sale
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The 2017 book sale is fast approaching and it is time to start preparing! This year the book sale has been postponed by a couple of weeks from the usual timing in late March to Friday 7 (9am to 5pm), Saturday 8 (9am to 5pm) and Sunday 11 (11am to 2pm) of April.
This is due to the fact that some of our key players will be overseas during the lead up to the actual book sale itself. This includes Andrew & Desley (13 Feb to 20 Mar), Bob & Bev (16 Mar to 14 Apr) and Colin & Anne (start Apr to end May). Whilst we now have some great additional people on our committee (Neville & Heather Hansen & Charlie), we will need all the help we can get from club members & partners to make this year’s book sale a success. This is especially true for the book sort days Saturday 11th, 25th March and Tuesday 4th April) where we really need people to help us for the whole day up to around 3 or 4pm. One of the most onerous jobs is packing the sorted boxes of books away on the book stands at the end of the sort day. Many times this is left to a small number of very dedicated people. Likewise we need assistance with the set up days Wednesday 5th & Thursday 6th April. In order to make it easier on our backs, knees, hips, etc, we are ditching the conventional fruit boxes (which are also extremely difficult to source) and are moving to the Lifeline size cardboard box which is about 2/3 the size of the fruit box and will hence will limit the total lifting weight to around 10kg. This is why Lifeline went to this style & size of box in order to comply with OH&S requirements for their ever aging members! These boxes come flat packed & are taped together as required. At the end of the book sale the tape will be cut & the box flat packed for storage. (See photo on right showing these boxes - note the 10Kg written on the side of the box in the foreground!). The Church has agreed to let us run the book sale on the Sunday from 11am to 2pm when we will start the usual pack up routine. This will provide an extra 3 hours on the Saturday and 3 hours on the Sunday, ie a total of 6 extra selling hours. The 2016 book sale raised around $14,000 and we are aiming to better this in 2017. To do this, we need help from ALL club members during the book sort days - Saturday 11 March Saturday 25 March Tuesday 4 April and during the sale itself from - Wednesday 5 to Sunday 9 April The milestone dates for this year's book sale are as follows: |
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| 2017 Book Sale Committee Meetings | |
| First Book Sale Committee Meeting | Thurs 9 Feb 17 |
| Second Book Sale Committee Meeting | Wed 1 Mar 17 |
| Third Book Sale Committee Meeting | Wed 29 Mar 17 |
| 2017 Book Sale Schedule | |
| Banners & Flyers out | Sat 25 Feb 17 |
| First Major Sort | Sat 11 Mar 17 |
| Second Major Sort | Sat 25 Mar 17 |
| Third Major Sort & Set Up Table Layout | Tue 4 Apr 17 |
| Continue to set up tables, boxes and signs | Wed 5 Apr 17 |
| Fine Tune Layout, etc | Thur 6 Apr 17 |
| Book Sale | Fri 7 Apr 17 |
| Book Sale | Sat 8 Apr 17 |
| Book Sale & Clean Up | Sun 9 Apr 17 |
| Book Sale Dinner | Sun 9 Apr 17 |
RYLA 2017 - this is an excerpt from the latest DG's E News & shows why we support RYLA
RYLA 2017 was run and won by 84 new RYLArians. The Organising Committee chaired by David Clark, supported the Facilitators lead by Amanda Firkins together with Mum & Dad (David and Dianne Waterhouse) arranged an excellent program that actively engaged and developed the attendees. The outdoor activities were challenging and the indoor speakers were compelling.
Well Done and Thank you to all who made it happen....and I hope that the experience convinces the new RYLArians to join Rotaract so they can continue to enjoy and enhance the Rotary experience.
Well Done and Thank you to all who made it happen....and I hope that the experience convinces the new RYLArians to join Rotaract so they can continue to enjoy and enhance the Rotary experience.
Significant Club fundraising events during the year
The Book Sale March 2016. As the result of a lot of hard work the March book fair which was a great success, especially from the organisers Max Henderson, Andrew Little and Clive Denmark. Funds raised were $14,000. Well done.
The Trivia Night
The Club held a very successful trivia night on Saturday 27 August 2016 at the Cherrybrook Community Centre, raising just over $5,000 towards the charities we support.
The Club held a very successful trivia night on Saturday 27 August 2016 at the Cherrybrook Community Centre, raising just over $5,000 towards the charities we support.
The Garage Sale
We have just had a very successful Garage Sale on the weekend of 8/9 October raising a record gross of over $30k. The combination of good planning and benign weather contributed to this result.
We have just had a very successful Garage Sale on the weekend of 8/9 October raising a record gross of over $30k. The combination of good planning and benign weather contributed to this result.
Barbecues
The club runs fund raising barbecues throughout the year, mainly at Bunnings (both Dural and Thornleigh) Here are Barry, Tony, Nick and David hard at work. at Thornleigh..
The club runs fund raising barbecues throughout the year, mainly at Bunnings (both Dural and Thornleigh) Here are Barry, Tony, Nick and David hard at work. at Thornleigh..
Meetings
Monday 6:30pm for 7:00pm - Springfield House - 245 New Line Road, Dural 2158
Apologies
If you are unable to attend or are bringing a guest (even if they are your partner) you must notify Jilda.
Phone 8484 7106 or email [email protected] before 11am on the day of the meeting.
Phone 8484 7106 or email [email protected] before 11am on the day of the meeting.
If you are expected and do not show you will be required to pay for the meal.
President's Report 27th February 2017
What a difference one amazing person can make to lighten the lives of others! Monday evening was a lesson in humility and kindness by Anna our guest speaker who helps under privileged families and children in Vietnam. Let’s work to help her in her quest.
Rotary is in full swing again as the committees get busy planning for the remainder of our year. Please notify Colin S of your availability for our 30th birthday celebration on May 8th. Our District Governor Bruce will be attending.
On Monday, Steve Mansur is travelling from Lake Cargelligo to inform us of the Murrin Bridge Farm Project in which we are involved. Come and hear how the project is progressing.
The Book Sale will soon be upon us. Please print out flyers to put in your work place, tell friends and use Facebook to spread the word. We have charities to support and places where extra money can go. Please commit to dates for helping. I’m just sad that I’m working and can only help on the weekends.
As the information becomes available for inbound Exchange students, consider being involved with hosting in one of the best programs Rotary has to offer. Our club is a better one when we are involved!! We would love to hear from you.
Have a great week and stay dry!!
Rosemary
Rotary is in full swing again as the committees get busy planning for the remainder of our year. Please notify Colin S of your availability for our 30th birthday celebration on May 8th. Our District Governor Bruce will be attending.
On Monday, Steve Mansur is travelling from Lake Cargelligo to inform us of the Murrin Bridge Farm Project in which we are involved. Come and hear how the project is progressing.
The Book Sale will soon be upon us. Please print out flyers to put in your work place, tell friends and use Facebook to spread the word. We have charities to support and places where extra money can go. Please commit to dates for helping. I’m just sad that I’m working and can only help on the weekends.
As the information becomes available for inbound Exchange students, consider being involved with hosting in one of the best programs Rotary has to offer. Our club is a better one when we are involved!! We would love to hear from you.
Have a great week and stay dry!!
Rosemary
Night Report 27th February 2017
NIGHT REPORT 27/02/2017
Sergeant Barry Freeman called the meeting to order and President Rosemary Clarke opened the meeting thanking all the guests. President Rosemary also sent out thank you emails to all the speakers at the last week’s youth meeting and shared the reply received from Ashley Eaton’s mum “Thank you for your kind words. The RYPEN camp certainly had a huge impact on Ash. It was interesting to see his demeanour when I dropped him off on Friday and the change when I picked him up on Sunday. Please send our thanks to all the Rotarians and again thank you for sponsoring Ash and thank you for a very inspiring evening.”
She also thanked Tony Coote for organising to have our BBQ trailer housed at Hills Self Storage at Galston. They have kindly agreed to store at no charge and the club has agreed to make them Silver sponsors.
Rotary Fact: On 23rd February Rotary celebrated its 112 birthday with the formation of Rotary Club of Chicago. Quote from Paul Harris – “Whatever Rotary may mean to us, to the world it will be measured by the results it achieves”.
Director’s Report:
Member Talk:
Guest Speaker
Colin Sharpe introduced the guest speaker Anna Papoosakis an early childhood educator for the last 17 years. Currently teaching the Bachelor of Early Childhood and completing her Masters in Educational Leadership.
Anna has been volunteering in Vietnam Orphanages for over 7 years now and has been serving the same 3 orphanages and loves her work. Two of the orphanages have children from birth until 16 years and one is a disability shelter where all the residents have been affected by Agent Orange – the chemical dropped by US during the Vietnam war.
When people ask her does she have children and she always says yes 134 of them. These children have captured her heart and over the last 7 years she has visited Vietnam more than 23 times.
Over the years she has exceeded all her expectations and have achieved much more than she could ever dream of. In 2012 she started a blog which helped to raise donations. She has learnt that you cannot help everyone though most of the residents in the rural area are so poor at times not even enough food yet they are always smiling and mange to see the good in the world.
One of her current project is to buy a cow and that cow has babies and provides an income for the family. A cow
costs $750/-. They can sell the calf and earn equivalent of 9 months’ salary with the money thereby regaining their dignity.
To date she has raised just over $75,000/- this has helped a boarding school in the mountains to get clear water. Sewers have been fixed so that do not overflow and contaminate the water. 45 orphans are provided with annual dental and optical check-ups, also provided 16 wheel chairs and 6 walkers, planted over 100 fruit trees and vegetable garden to make them self-sustainable. Started an incense making business, 5 agent orange victims have been sent for computer training courses, 60 highly disabled residents at Peace Village have an extra career. Donations have also supported salaries of physiotherapists, 33 children have remained in school because of the bicycles provided. 100 orphan kids saw the beach for the first time. 44 orphans have been provided with school uniforms every year. In conjunction with Rotary we have recently began a vaccination program after 3 children died from mumps. Rotary has also helped in building toilets and showers improving living standards and hygiene. The list goes on for more details please visit my blog www.missionnampossible.blogspot.com.au
Your club’s contribution in cash or kind will go a long way – we can’t fix everything everywhere, but we could surly make it better.
Winners:
Ross Ballinger won the Raffle, Heads & Tails won by Bernard Chandra.
Next Week:
Steve from Murrin Bridge project that we have sponsored will give the club an update.
Jilda’s email [email protected] If you don’t inform Jilda remember - YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY NO IFS NO BUTS
Night Report: Cawas Sahukar
Sergeant Barry Freeman called the meeting to order and President Rosemary Clarke opened the meeting thanking all the guests. President Rosemary also sent out thank you emails to all the speakers at the last week’s youth meeting and shared the reply received from Ashley Eaton’s mum “Thank you for your kind words. The RYPEN camp certainly had a huge impact on Ash. It was interesting to see his demeanour when I dropped him off on Friday and the change when I picked him up on Sunday. Please send our thanks to all the Rotarians and again thank you for sponsoring Ash and thank you for a very inspiring evening.”
She also thanked Tony Coote for organising to have our BBQ trailer housed at Hills Self Storage at Galston. They have kindly agreed to store at no charge and the club has agreed to make them Silver sponsors.
Rotary Fact: On 23rd February Rotary celebrated its 112 birthday with the formation of Rotary Club of Chicago. Quote from Paul Harris – “Whatever Rotary may mean to us, to the world it will be measured by the results it achieves”.
Director’s Report:
- Max Henderson Director Fund Raising – This is one of our major fund raiser and all members partners and available family members help in sorting and setting up will be greatly appreciated. (Ed. note - please consult the event schedule under the Book Sale section for detail information.)
- Colin Sharpe Director Social Committee – Lovedale Progressive Long Lunch requested members and partners to respond again to Roslyn and myself by the end of this week even if you previously did. Roslyn needs to make the booking next week. If we do not get at least 20 people the event will be cancelled. Invite your friends and family along.to help fill up the bus.
- Due to the numbers expressing an interest in attending the Lovedale Long Lunch Roslyn has obtained a cost using a smaller 33 seater bus. The lunch will be held in the Hunter valley on Sunday May 21st 2017. Details are:
Price ($140 each - up from $135) includes 2 courses chosen from 3 options at different venues (wineries). The day would start at 8 am from Cherrybrook and return at 10 pm. Note the $140 is for a 33 seat coach).
More details at https://www.lovedalehuntervalley.com.au/lovedale-long-lunch/.
Another reminder that we are holding a club 30th Birthday celebration on May 8th at Springfield House 245 New Line Rd Dural. The evening will start at 6.00pm for drinks and canapés while we catch up with old friends (Past members are being invited) before dinner. The meeting will finish at 9.30 pm and have the same meal format as a partners meeting. We will be showcasing some of our projects that you may have been involved in and perhaps many of our current members wouldn’t know of. The cost for the night is $30.00pp. While the closing time for RSVP is April 30 (Members just let Jilda know if you are not attending in the normal manner) an early indication of your intent to attend or not by the end of February will help the Social Team with the planning.
- Keith Ball Director Membership – Paul Larouminie has consented to join our club. Tina Su is our guest tonight who is looking at joining. Tina’s family has a long connection with Rotary. Tuesday Membership meeting at Keith Ball’s residence.
- Tony Coote Director Youth - the committee has been approached by District who has offered a choice of 2 inbound exchange students both are boys, one from Germany and another from Japan. Currently we have only 2 host families and we need 2 more. In case anyone is interested they should contact Tony Coote.
- John Tchetchenian Director Vocational Service – we have received the banner on Pride of Workmanship. Nominations are open for the above.
- David Turnbull – gave an update on Graham Cuthbertson and some of the club members helped in clearing up the place but more help will be needed and there will be a working bee on Sunday 19 March. For more details to contact David.
- Cawas Sahukar Director Community Service – the club has contributed $1,000/- towards the cost of refrigerated van for Meals on Wheels and the official handover of the new refrigerated van is on Saturday 4th March at 7 Gilroy Road Turramurra and Colin Sharpe and Cawas Sahukar will represent the club. Any other member who wants to attend are most welcome.
- Ross Ballinger provided an update report especially on Tree of Joy which was a resounding success and members and partners should be very proud of their fantastic efforts to bring joy into the lives of less fortunate. When questioned on Taldumande Youth project Cawas explained that lot of work has been done and it is time to focus our energies on other worth while projects. In terms of pending projects the club has committed to run again this year Ronald McDonald House Meals from the Heart date TBA. Cherrybrook girl guides project is on hold pending clarification from Hornsby Council. We will also be participating in the Red Shield Appeal to be held in May.
- Keith Ball Director Membership made an impassioned plea that increasing membership is everyone’s obligation. He has run out of pipeline and is looking towards the members to assist him. All members have been provided with business cards and other tools to talk to their social circle and neighbourhood for “if you don’t ask you won’t know” so please talk to your friends.
- Ross Ballinger is looking for contact details for the following members - Jim Kehoe, Graham McDonald. Bob Myers.
Member Talk:
- Roslyn Savio born in Paddington and went to the local school.
- Always wanted to travel so left school to join Qantas but it was not to be so clearly she had no regrets.
- Joined a travel agency in Kings Cross “Australia Overseas Travel” worked very hard as in those days there were no computers and everything had to be done manually.
- Joined American Express and exceled herself winning a trip overseas.
- Moved to Philippines with her then husband and their beautiful daughter Marika was born there.
- Marriage did not work out and Roslyn moved back to Sydney and joined National Australia Bank Travel Division looking after corporate and retail sector customers.
- On 7th January 1992 she started her very own business and from a humble beginning she now employs a total of 8 staff.
- Met dashing Gino 11 years ago fell in love and decided to get married.
- Been in the travel industry for over 47 years and all she ever wanted to do for a living was to sell travel and today she has a long list of prestigious corporate and high-worth clients whom she helps in turning their travel dreams into a reality. For your next travel adventure contact Roslyn and you won’t be disappointed.
Guest Speaker
Colin Sharpe introduced the guest speaker Anna Papoosakis an early childhood educator for the last 17 years. Currently teaching the Bachelor of Early Childhood and completing her Masters in Educational Leadership.
Anna has been volunteering in Vietnam Orphanages for over 7 years now and has been serving the same 3 orphanages and loves her work. Two of the orphanages have children from birth until 16 years and one is a disability shelter where all the residents have been affected by Agent Orange – the chemical dropped by US during the Vietnam war.
When people ask her does she have children and she always says yes 134 of them. These children have captured her heart and over the last 7 years she has visited Vietnam more than 23 times.
Over the years she has exceeded all her expectations and have achieved much more than she could ever dream of. In 2012 she started a blog which helped to raise donations. She has learnt that you cannot help everyone though most of the residents in the rural area are so poor at times not even enough food yet they are always smiling and mange to see the good in the world.
One of her current project is to buy a cow and that cow has babies and provides an income for the family. A cow
costs $750/-. They can sell the calf and earn equivalent of 9 months’ salary with the money thereby regaining their dignity.
To date she has raised just over $75,000/- this has helped a boarding school in the mountains to get clear water. Sewers have been fixed so that do not overflow and contaminate the water. 45 orphans are provided with annual dental and optical check-ups, also provided 16 wheel chairs and 6 walkers, planted over 100 fruit trees and vegetable garden to make them self-sustainable. Started an incense making business, 5 agent orange victims have been sent for computer training courses, 60 highly disabled residents at Peace Village have an extra career. Donations have also supported salaries of physiotherapists, 33 children have remained in school because of the bicycles provided. 100 orphan kids saw the beach for the first time. 44 orphans have been provided with school uniforms every year. In conjunction with Rotary we have recently began a vaccination program after 3 children died from mumps. Rotary has also helped in building toilets and showers improving living standards and hygiene. The list goes on for more details please visit my blog www.missionnampossible.blogspot.com.au
Your club’s contribution in cash or kind will go a long way – we can’t fix everything everywhere, but we could surly make it better.
Winners:
Ross Ballinger won the Raffle, Heads & Tails won by Bernard Chandra.
Next Week:
Steve from Murrin Bridge project that we have sponsored will give the club an update.
Jilda’s email [email protected] If you don’t inform Jilda remember - YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY NO IFS NO BUTS
Night Report: Cawas Sahukar
Night Photos - Peter Stanton
Birthdays
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Bernard Chandra 12th March
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Anniversaries
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NIL
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This Week's Humour
God loves drunk people too
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"
He slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife... "Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.
"Did you help him?" she asks
"No, I did not, it's 3am in the morning and it's bloomin' well pouring with rain out there!"
"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us?
I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself! "God loves drunk people too you know."
The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.
He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"
"Yes," comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?" asks the husband.
"Over here... on the swing," replied the drunk.
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There were four churches and a synagogue in a small town:
a Presbyterian church, a Baptist church, a Methodist church,
a Catholic church and a Jewish synagogue. Each church
and the synagogue had a problem with squirrels.
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to
do about their squirrels. After much prayer and consideration
they determined the squirrels were predestined to be there
and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.
At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the
baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water slide
on the baptistery & let the squirrels slide in & drown themselves.
The squirrels liked the slide &, unfortunately, knew instinctively
how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.
The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to
harm any of God's creatures. So, they humanely trapped their
squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks
later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the
water slide.
But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy.
They baptized all the squirrels & consecrated them as members
of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.
Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue, they took one
squirrel and circumcised him. They haven't seen a squirrel since.
-- Jim Simpson
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"
He slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife... "Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.
"Did you help him?" she asks
"No, I did not, it's 3am in the morning and it's bloomin' well pouring with rain out there!"
"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us?
I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself! "God loves drunk people too you know."
The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.
He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"
"Yes," comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?" asks the husband.
"Over here... on the swing," replied the drunk.
========================================================================================================================================================
There were four churches and a synagogue in a small town:
a Presbyterian church, a Baptist church, a Methodist church,
a Catholic church and a Jewish synagogue. Each church
and the synagogue had a problem with squirrels.
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to
do about their squirrels. After much prayer and consideration
they determined the squirrels were predestined to be there
and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.
At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the
baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water slide
on the baptistery & let the squirrels slide in & drown themselves.
The squirrels liked the slide &, unfortunately, knew instinctively
how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.
The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to
harm any of God's creatures. So, they humanely trapped their
squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks
later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the
water slide.
But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy.
They baptized all the squirrels & consecrated them as members
of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.
Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue, they took one
squirrel and circumcised him. They haven't seen a squirrel since.
-- Jim Simpson
Club Calendar
Editor's Note: If you wish to download and print the Calendar please click here.
Bulletin Editor - Douglas Lam
