Presidents Report
Tonight, we had some 31 people attend and tonight was a Technology night. It was a lot of fun and lots of laughs and we managed to do the following:
Updates from past week:
So, this week:
That’s it for the week so Let’s look after each other, stay safe and let’s do it.
Regards Neville Hansen
- We have created "Whats On" for the Club. This will give you the detail of all the events leading up to our events in the Club Calendar. e.g. loading up of the trailer the day before a BBQ. We added a link onto people’s smartphone so people know "Whats On" all the time and if they want to help.
- We added a link onto people’s Smartphone for the Club Calendar
- We added all the contacts for our Club Members and Partners to people’s smartphone. It is a copy of the Club Directory.
Updates from past week:
- Board Meeting on Wed 12 July:
- District Grant: The Club has submitted a District Grant for a 3.5kW Generator. We have had to provide our own power at two events last year and have had to beg/borrow a generator for these events.
- Z8 Regionalisation Representative – Anne Sharpe & Neville Hansen
- Greater Hills Rotary Club Changeover was on Tuesday 11th July at the Galston Club. Janelle and I attended. Was good to see how other Clubs do it and was good for networking.
- 2024 District Conference on 15 & 16th March: On Friday 15 March 2024 is Terrigal Crowne Plaza for the Friday night dinner with a beach party theme and Saturday 16 March for a one-day conference at the EV Church Erina – a roomy tiered venue with comfortable seating. They have some great speakers lined up and a terrific showcase along with the chance to connect with friends, meet new people and have fun on the amazing Central Coast! Please register asap. Bob Kay-Smith who is the 2024 District Conference Chair, will be visiting us on Monday 6th Nov to promote it further.
- Rearrangement of BBQ equipment at Church. On Wed 12th July, Janelle, Adrian and myself rearranged the BBQ equipment at the Church. All labelled and shelves labelled.
- Rotary Leadership Institute Courses (RLI): RLI is a training course offered to Rotarians to develop their skills in leadership and management within Clubs to improve performance, knowledge and enjoyment in leading or helping to lead Clubs in the District. The next course, currently open for registrations is 11-13th Aug. Run via Zoom and starts on Friday night. Would recommend anyone who has been in Rotary for over 12 months to do this course.
- Meeting with Iisa on Zoom on Sunday night, 16 July. Iisa and her family, Georgia Ryman & family, Janelle, Rosemary, Peter & Julianne and myself. Iisa arrives at 6:25am on 28th July.
- International Student Commitment. Everything is coming together but this is a commitment by the Club. We all need to get involved and help the Host families. If you are going somewhere pls ask the Host Family if you can take Iisa. Multiple benefits, Good for you, good for Iisa, rest for the Host family
- Friendship dinner was held at Baxter’s on Sunday 16th July, lunchtime. A good afternoon was had by all. Thanks to Gwen & Colin.
- Sponsorship Officer – Sue Moore is away for another week or so then then going back to the US in October for some 12 months. We have asked Sandra White to take on the Sponsorship Officer role and Sandra has accepted. Thank you, Sandra.
- Global Grant: There have been a couple of meetings in the last week re the Global grant and we are making good progress on the Global Grant Response.
- Club Visioning. I have talked to Robert Bredin who is President of Norwest Sunrise and who also is qualified to do Visioning for the District. Ideally do it over two Zoom meetings with the whole Club. One Zoom meeting to collect information from the whole Club, Board then reviews and then presented back to Club at next Board meeting. I will ask Robert to join us on a Zoom meeting one night to explain more. Our last visioning was more than 5 years ago.
- Photos – Raise the Kilt. A photo was shared of Raining the Kilt. This has now been put to bed.
- Desley & Andrew’s daughter Rosemary has won Bronze at the World Para Athletics Championships in Paris in Shot put launching a 6.33m throw. Well done Rosemary.
So, this week:
- Friendship Dinners:
Friday night, 21st July at Rashna & Cawas’s - Janelle & Cawas have a meeting on Tuesday night with Coonabarabran re The Science Experience which is usually at Macquarie Uni. Coonabarabran already has three students lined up.
- Janelle has a District Domestic Violence Committee meeting on Friday 21st July, afternoon.
- First Presidents meetings with DG Christine Owen on Saturday 22 July
- Next Monday’s night is a face-to-face meeting at The Vicar. It would be great to see as many Members and Partners attend so we can make an information decision.
- DG Christine Owen on Mon 31 July. Should be a good night. Christine is very approachable.
That’s it for the week so Let’s look after each other, stay safe and let’s do it.
Regards Neville Hansen
Night Report
Sergeant Tony Coote called the meeting to order and asked Douglas Lam to propose a toast. Douglas toasted Rotary International and ‘may temperance never falter’.
President Neville welcomed members and partners to the meeting and gave a special welcome to Tim Sharpe and our two new members being inducted tonight, Sandra White and Monica Sweeney.
Updates from past week included:
This week:
Directors’ Reports
Foundation – David Turnbull encouraged members to donate $100 to Centurion Foundation within next 12 months. The Foundation does such good work.
Fundraising - Janelle said there has been an overwhelming response to the Bunnings BBQ at Castle Hill on 12 August.
We need to get tables booked for Trivia Night on 26 August at Cherrybrook Community Centre. Tables of 8. There was a hint to brush up on your music trivia. Proceeds from the evening are going to Blue Wren House, Camden Women’s Shelter.
International - Peter Stanton advised there is a donors’ trip to Flores, Indonesia on 26 October, leaving Bali for five days in the field.
Vocational - Neville advised vocational visit to 3D Printing on Monday 14 August.
Youth - Cawas is doing the bulk of Youth with Rosemary looking after Youth Exchange.
Following the directors’ reports our two new members, Monica Sweeney and Sandra White, were inducted. Sandra transferred from Rotary Club of Ku-ring-gai.
The inductions were followed by a technology session where links were added to members’ Smartphones, with assistance from Andrew and Tim, providing ‘What’s On’, Club calendar and Club directory.
Douglas asked anyone going to Pennant Hills Golf Club on 28 July to make payment.
Max said there has been a good response to members attending ‘The Perfect Murder’ at Woy Woy Little Theatre on 18 August, however it would be great to get a few more attendees. Details are in the Bulletin.
Tony reminded members to pay their dues.
Sergeant’s Session
Tony showed us a few fun tricks to do on your iPhone his grandchildren taught him.
The raffle was won by Juliane Stanton.
Heads and tails was won by David Turnbull.
Night Reporter: Ros Hogan
President Neville welcomed members and partners to the meeting and gave a special welcome to Tim Sharpe and our two new members being inducted tonight, Sandra White and Monica Sweeney.
Updates from past week included:
- Board meeting Wednesday 12 July
- The Club has submitted a District Grant for a 3.5kW Generator
- Neville Hansen and Anne Sharpe to be Zone 8 Representatives
- Greater Hills Rotary Club changeover Tuesday 11 July at Galston Club attended by Neville and Janelle.
- 2024 District Conference 15 and 16 March on Central Coast.
- 12 July Janelle, Adrian and Neville rearranged, labelled, and cleaned BBQ equipment at Church.
- Members who have been in Club for at least 12 months should consider attending Rotary Leadership Institute courses.
- On 16 July Janelle, Rosemary, Peter, Julianne and Neville held Zoom meeting with incoming exchange student, Iisa and her family.
- Hosting exchange students is a commitment by the Club. We all need to get involved and help host families. If you are going somewhere ask host family if you can take Iisa.
- Thanks to Gwen and Colin Baxter who held a friendship lunch on Sunday. A good time was had by all.
- Sue Moore will be returning to US in October for 12 months. Sandra White has taken on Sponsorship Officer role.
- There have been a couple of meetings in the last week re Global grant and we are making good progress on the Global Grant Response.
- Neville has spoken with Robert Bredin, President Norwest Sunrise who is qualified to do Visioning for the District. Robert will join us on a Zoom meeting to explain more. Last Visioning done more than 5 years ago.
- Photos were shown of Neville ‘raising the kilt’
- Andrew and Desley Little’s daughter, Rosemary, was congratulated on winning a bronze medal in Seated Shot Put at the World Championships in Paris last week.
This week:
- Friday 21 July friendship dinner at Rashna and Cawas’ home
- Saturday 22 July first Presidents meeting with DG Christine Owen
Directors’ Reports
Foundation – David Turnbull encouraged members to donate $100 to Centurion Foundation within next 12 months. The Foundation does such good work.
Fundraising - Janelle said there has been an overwhelming response to the Bunnings BBQ at Castle Hill on 12 August.
We need to get tables booked for Trivia Night on 26 August at Cherrybrook Community Centre. Tables of 8. There was a hint to brush up on your music trivia. Proceeds from the evening are going to Blue Wren House, Camden Women’s Shelter.
International - Peter Stanton advised there is a donors’ trip to Flores, Indonesia on 26 October, leaving Bali for five days in the field.
Vocational - Neville advised vocational visit to 3D Printing on Monday 14 August.
Youth - Cawas is doing the bulk of Youth with Rosemary looking after Youth Exchange.
Following the directors’ reports our two new members, Monica Sweeney and Sandra White, were inducted. Sandra transferred from Rotary Club of Ku-ring-gai.
The inductions were followed by a technology session where links were added to members’ Smartphones, with assistance from Andrew and Tim, providing ‘What’s On’, Club calendar and Club directory.
Douglas asked anyone going to Pennant Hills Golf Club on 28 July to make payment.
Max said there has been a good response to members attending ‘The Perfect Murder’ at Woy Woy Little Theatre on 18 August, however it would be great to get a few more attendees. Details are in the Bulletin.
Tony reminded members to pay their dues.
Sergeant’s Session
Tony showed us a few fun tricks to do on your iPhone his grandchildren taught him.
The raffle was won by Juliane Stanton.
Heads and tails was won by David Turnbull.
Night Reporter: Ros Hogan
Humour
Absolutely Priceless ... contributed by Cawas
An Elementary School Teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverbs and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you.
While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!
1. Don't change horses -- until they stop running.
2. Strike while the -- bug is close.
3. It's always darkest before -- Daylight Saving Time.
4. Never underestimate the power of -- termites.
5. You can lead a horse to water but -- how?
6. Don't bite the hand that -- looks dirty.
7. No news is -- impossible.
8. A miss is as good as a -- Mr.
9. You can't teach an old dog new -- math.
10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll -- stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust --- me.
12. The pen is mightier than the -- pigs.
13. An idle mind is -- the best way to relax.
14. Where there's smoke there's -- pollution.
15. Happy the bride who -- gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is -- not much.
17. Two's company, three's -- the Musketeers.
18. Don't put off till tomorrow what -- you put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and -- you have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as -- Stevie Wonder.
21. Children should be seen and not -- spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don't succeed -- get new batteries.
23. You get out of something only what you -- see in the picture on the box.
24. When the blind lead the blind -- get out of the way.
25. A bird in the hand -- is going to poop on you.
While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!
1. Don't change horses -- until they stop running.
2. Strike while the -- bug is close.
3. It's always darkest before -- Daylight Saving Time.
4. Never underestimate the power of -- termites.
5. You can lead a horse to water but -- how?
6. Don't bite the hand that -- looks dirty.
7. No news is -- impossible.
8. A miss is as good as a -- Mr.
9. You can't teach an old dog new -- math.
10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll -- stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust --- me.
12. The pen is mightier than the -- pigs.
13. An idle mind is -- the best way to relax.
14. Where there's smoke there's -- pollution.
15. Happy the bride who -- gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is -- not much.
17. Two's company, three's -- the Musketeers.
18. Don't put off till tomorrow what -- you put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and -- you have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as -- Stevie Wonder.
21. Children should be seen and not -- spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don't succeed -- get new batteries.
23. You get out of something only what you -- see in the picture on the box.
24. When the blind lead the blind -- get out of the way.
25. A bird in the hand -- is going to poop on you.
Words of Wisdom for you ... contributed by Jim
01. If a bottle of poison reaches its expiration date, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
02. Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?
03. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
04. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
05. The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".
06. Over 100 years ago, everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
07. If people evolved from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
08. Why is there a 'D' in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
09. As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake!
10. I'm responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
11. Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it.
12. My tolerance for idiots is extremely low these days. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously, there's a new strain out there.
14. It's not my age that bothers me - it's the side effects.
15. I'm not saying I'm old and worn out, but I make sure I'm nowhere near the curb on trash day.
16. As I watch this generation try and rewrite our history, I'm sure of one thing: it will be misspelled and have no punctuation.
17. As I've gotten older, people think I've become lazy. The truth is I'm just being more energy-efficient.
18. I haven't gotten anything done today. I've been in the Produce Department trying to open this stupid plastic bag.
19. If you find yourself feeling useless, remember: it took 20 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives and four presidents to replace the Taliban with the Taliban.
20. Turns out that being a "senior" is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
21. I want to be 18 again and ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.
22. I'm on two simultaneous diets. I wasn't getting enough food on one.
23. I put my scale in the bathroom corner and that's where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.
24. My mind is like an internet browser. At least 18 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from.
25. Hard to believe I once had a phone attached to a wall, and when it rang, I picked it up without knowing who was calling.
26. My wife says I keep pushing her buttons. If that were true, I would have found mute by now.
27. There is no such thing as a grouchy old person. The truth is that once you get old, you stop being polite and start being honest.
02. Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?
03. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
04. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
05. The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".
06. Over 100 years ago, everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
07. If people evolved from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
08. Why is there a 'D' in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
09. As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake!
10. I'm responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
11. Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it.
12. My tolerance for idiots is extremely low these days. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously, there's a new strain out there.
14. It's not my age that bothers me - it's the side effects.
15. I'm not saying I'm old and worn out, but I make sure I'm nowhere near the curb on trash day.
16. As I watch this generation try and rewrite our history, I'm sure of one thing: it will be misspelled and have no punctuation.
17. As I've gotten older, people think I've become lazy. The truth is I'm just being more energy-efficient.
18. I haven't gotten anything done today. I've been in the Produce Department trying to open this stupid plastic bag.
19. If you find yourself feeling useless, remember: it took 20 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives and four presidents to replace the Taliban with the Taliban.
20. Turns out that being a "senior" is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
21. I want to be 18 again and ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.
22. I'm on two simultaneous diets. I wasn't getting enough food on one.
23. I put my scale in the bathroom corner and that's where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.
24. My mind is like an internet browser. At least 18 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from.
25. Hard to believe I once had a phone attached to a wall, and when it rang, I picked it up without knowing who was calling.
26. My wife says I keep pushing her buttons. If that were true, I would have found mute by now.
27. There is no such thing as a grouchy old person. The truth is that once you get old, you stop being polite and start being honest.
Knicker Stitcher and others ... contributed by Cawas
Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office:
When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher, i sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs."
The clerk looked up Knicker Stitcher on his computer and finding it classified as unskilled labour, he gave him £80 a week unemployment pay.
Mick was next in and when asked his occupation replied. "Diesel Fitter."
Since a diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Mick £160 a week.
When Paddy found out he was furious.
He stormed back into the office to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double his pay.
The clerk explained....
"Knicker Stitchers are unskilled labour and Diesel Fitters are skilled labour."
"What skill?" Yelled Paddy.
'I sew da elastic on da knickers and thongs, then Mick puts 'em over his head and says:
"Yep, diesel fitter." 🤣😂
A poodle and a collie are walking together when the poodle suddenly unloads on his friend. “My life is a mess,” he says. “My owner is mean, my girlfriend ran away with a schnauzer and I’m as jittery as a cat.”�“Why don’t you go see a psychiatrist?” suggests the collie.�“I can’t,” says the poodle. “I’m not allowed on the couch.” 🤣😂
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away. 🤣😂
At 12pm yesterday I finally plucked up the courage to phone Gamblers Anonymous. They told me to phone back at 20 to1.🤣😂
When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher, i sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs."
The clerk looked up Knicker Stitcher on his computer and finding it classified as unskilled labour, he gave him £80 a week unemployment pay.
Mick was next in and when asked his occupation replied. "Diesel Fitter."
Since a diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Mick £160 a week.
When Paddy found out he was furious.
He stormed back into the office to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double his pay.
The clerk explained....
"Knicker Stitchers are unskilled labour and Diesel Fitters are skilled labour."
"What skill?" Yelled Paddy.
'I sew da elastic on da knickers and thongs, then Mick puts 'em over his head and says:
"Yep, diesel fitter." 🤣😂
A poodle and a collie are walking together when the poodle suddenly unloads on his friend. “My life is a mess,” he says. “My owner is mean, my girlfriend ran away with a schnauzer and I’m as jittery as a cat.”�“Why don’t you go see a psychiatrist?” suggests the collie.�“I can’t,” says the poodle. “I’m not allowed on the couch.” 🤣😂
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away. 🤣😂
At 12pm yesterday I finally plucked up the courage to phone Gamblers Anonymous. They told me to phone back at 20 to1.🤣😂
How May I Help You... contributed by Cawas
Prescription ... contributed by Jim
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